Well, it sure is an exciting time to be an unpaid employee at Guy & Campbell. Still on the heels of Vernon D. Burns’s debut release, we’re looking forward to two more publications in the upcoming months. We are simply oscillating with joy, I can assure you, and I would be oscillating even more wildly if we could get at least minimum wage for all of my effort and expertise, but apparently this is a good “learning experience.”
Like I said, we have great news! April will mark the release of Double Feature. What’s better than one book? Depending on the book, the answer would be two! Double Feature will include two novellas, both of them fitting somewhere into the genre of horror. Vernon D. Burns will be offering up a brand new novella, “Furry Piranha,” to start off this double threat. Here’s what Vernon D. Burns has to say about the novella: “It’s a story about annoying people getting eaten by piranhas. What the hell else would it be about?” He also hinted that other dangers besides piranhas might be eating these annoying people, but he wouldn’t give any specifics. He rarely does when he has been drinking.
The second offering in Double Feature will be “The Curse of the Screwnicorn,” an allegory about the dangers of unchecked scientific progress written by none other than Albert Clapp. Mr. Clapp is an up-and-coming author, which means nobody’s heard of him yet. But they will! Double Feature will be available, like all Guy & Campbell titles that are currently in print, on the Amazon.com website. Be the first one in your house to read it!
Following this orgasm-worthy release, June will mark another exciting milestone when we will be releasing Gwennifer Plodder’s debut horror novel, Visitor From the Deep. Darwin Guy, co-manager of Guy & Campbell Publishing, has this to say about Visitor From the Deep: “Not since Gods of the Jungle Planet have I found myself so moved by a work of fiction. This is certainly a groundbreaking work of fiction that reminds me strongly of what you’d get if you combined the subject matter of H.P. Lovecraft with the brilliant prose of Toni Morrison. Truly, I can’t wait until it’s finished so I can find out how it ends.”
Well, won’t the next five-months be exciting? A lot of exciting, awesome, super-cool events coming up, and more may be announced any day. But don’t hold your breath. If you do, you might die, or at least pass out, before anything new is announced. Just check back every few hours or so.